Listening to What You Want
I found my old list of ‘career goals’ the other day: a list I made when I was a fresh college graduate almost a decade ago.
I wrote typical, naive, impersonal goals. I should go to this school, because it will open up doors and expand my options. I should take this degree, because that will guarantee my success.
I should take this job, because it will be good for my career. I should enter this industry, because they say this sector’s the future. I should change jobs after a few years because that’s what people do to progress.
I shudder when I see the amount of shoulds on the list.
Should implies some invisible, external hand is forcing me, demanding me to take certain actions. Should interacts with an invisible third party that does not have my best interest at heart.
Should is safe because I can hide behind the crowd. I feel safe because I am shrouded. I can blame or defer my decisions to a group of unknown everyones. I don’t need to choose.
Should implies the collective decision-making made by a crowd for the ‘average’ individual. But none of us are average. We are born and made uniqely to live out our passions and wants.
No matter how terrifying that is.
I do understand why it’s so easy to embrace the comfort of should.
We yearn for safety. I yearn for safety.
I too was afraid early on to pursue the causes I truly want to work on. I thought I didn’t know any better. I thought I didn’t know what I want. I thought I was too foolish and idealistic. So where would I even begin?
But those excuses only work when we are young, when we are still in the process of discovering ourselves. The world is a scary place. The unknowns are intimidating, and we may not be as prepared as we should be.
Freedom can be terrifying.
Freedom requires courage because you expose your identity into the wild.
But your story only begins when you learn to be brave. When you learn to listen to yourself.
I knew what I wanted to for the rest of my life about five years ago: I wanted to solve problems in the education space.
I didn't know in what role or capacity I would be doing so: an educator, an executive, or an entrepreneur.
But I put off that decision, even if I knew what my inner voice wanted.
I went to business school and recruited for jobs that had nothing to do with the sector or cause I cared about, because I thought I needed to “hedge” my bets and have safer options.
The decision was practical. But it stemmed from my own lack of courage.
I tried to recruit for jobs that allowed me to stay in the US, even if my heart knew I wanted to return to Southeast Asia. I tried staying in the US because that what’s people told me I should be doing.
They told me to follow the proven playbook for success.
Instead, I did what I wanted. That was terrifying.
We get these pivotal moments when we are given the choice: whether to stay in the safety of the conventional, or to venture out and write our own stories.
For me, the chance to be part of ErudiFi was the catalyst. And I chose to listen to my inner voice.
I chose to not follow the ‘post-MBA career norms’, and what everyone expected me to do. I didn’t want to work in a “safe” company for a few years before pursuing my calling. I didn’t have the patience to build a “moat” around my career by putting a few brand names on my resume.
I decided I’ve built enough safety nets. It’s time to answer the call and begin the journey. Otherwise, what am I gathering these safety nets for? I want to write my own chapter in this part of the world.
That freedom, that choice to listen, comes with fear and self-doubt. You no longer have the voices of others meddling with your life.
That quiet is unsettling. It’s tempting to look back at the safety of the conventional we’ve given up. Especially when life gets tough.
But don’t look back.
What we mistake as safety and assurance are just shackles. It’s easy to confuse comfort and dormancy.
Don’t look back.
We are meant to live and write our own paths. Otherwise, what are we striving for?
So listen to yourself. Cultivate that inner voice and give it a chance to speak to the world.
Why settle for a life doing what you should be doing, rather than doing what you want to be doing?
Listen to yourself.
Be brave.
Because to trade away our freedom for the conventional is to mute our inner voice. Do you hear that sound? That’s your life’s passion calling.
Listen to yourself.
Adventures always begin with courage.
